Another hurdle jumped

its just a tiny little thing, but it still feels like another hurdle gone by. Today I received an email from PCRM letting me know that the RE has approved my health questionnaire. Which means that the screening is good to go. So on St Patty’s Day I’ll be heading to Vancouver for medical screening, counselling, and a lesson on injecting myself with meds. Things are starting to line up 🙂

Questions and Answers

So even though I have only just started the surrogacy process, I am getting a lot of questions already. Here’s my best shot to answer some of them – though I know that more will crop up.

Q: How will you give the baby up? Won’t you miss it?

A: It’s not my baby. I’m not giving him/her/them up. I’m giving him BACK. I’m going into this knowing full well that this baby does not belong to me. Of course I would love to see pictures and get updates, but I don’t want another baby of my own. I’m not worried.

Q: Won’t it be half yours?

A: No. It will have no genetic relation to me at all. We will be using IM’s egg and IF’s sperm. The embryo(s) will be created in the lab, and transferred into my uterus somewhere between 3-5 days of age – though they will likely be frozen at that stage a couple months before they are implanted.

Q: When will you get pregnant?

A: I don’t know yet. The screening appointment is March 17. If all goes well and the RE approves me, then we have to get contracts going, and meds started. I’m guessing the earliest we would transfer would be May.

Q: Meds? What meds? 

A: Again, I don’t know for sure. The RE will tailor a medication schedule as he sees fit. Commonly, surrogates are given a combination of estrogen and progesterone. Sometimes as shots, sometimes as vaginal suppositories. Other medications could include but are not limited to blood thinners. I will have to bring all my immunizations up to date as well if they are not already.

Q: What does this screening involve?

A: I don’t know all the details myself. I know there is a counselling part of it, where they tell me exactly what is involved in becoming a surrogate, and evaluate if they think I am psychologically able to go through everything to have a baby for someone else, and that I won’t have issues returning the baby to its family once all is said and done. I know that I will have blood tests done, and I know that they have to perform tests on my uterus to make sure it is healthy, and has a good chance of the Embryo implanting.

Q: What do all these abbreviations that you keep using mean?

A: IP = Intended Parents, IM = Intended Mother, IF = Intended Father, RE = Reproductive Endocrinologist, PCRM = the fertility company we are using, BFP = Big Fat Positive (pregnancy test) BFN = Big Fat Negative, _dp_dt = _ days past _ day transfer (ie, taking a pregnancy test at 4dp5dt means 4 days after transferring a 5 day old embryo). 

Q: Why am I doing this?

A: I’ve always felt the need to give back in any way I can. I feel very fortunate to have such wonderful kids in my life and I want others to have the same joy. I can’t afford to help people out financially, but growing babies is something I am good at. And the gift of a child is a gift that lasts a lifetime. It’s some real good that I can do in this world. I feel called to it, and I can’t wait to make a family’s dreams come true.
I know more will come up, but that’s all I can think of for now. Check back later for more.

The Baker

Surrogacy and Me

Surrogacy is something that I have thought about for many years. I always thought that it was such a wonderful, amazing thing to do. But I wasn’t sure that I could do it myself. I worried about how attached I might get to the baby(ies). But still, it lingered in my mind. Then, one of my friends became a surrogate mother. I followed her journey closely, and looked at the pictures in awe. She helped to create a beautiful family. And her IPs (intended parents) were over the moon happy. From then on, surrogacy was never far from my mind. My friend has now delivered three babies for the same IPs (twins and a singleton), another friend just recently delivered a singleton for her IPs, and another friend just got a BFP (Big Fat Positive) with her first surrogate pregnancy. 

Last summer, in 2014, surrogacy began to really weigh on my mind, a lot. I wanted to help someone make a family. My kids have given me so much pleasure, and I would just love to have a hand in helping someone else get that amazing joy out of life. In August I finally made up my mind. I knew for the first time that I was really done with my own family. Three kids is enough for me. But I want to be pregnant again, and I want to help create a family. As soon as I made the decision I knew it was right. It gives me great joy to think I will be giving someone the gift of a baby. I no longer worry about becoming attached. The baby isn’t mine. It will have no genetic link to me at all. I’m Just The Baker.

I have been in contact with an amazing couple since September 2014. They have been through hell and back in their journey for a baby, and I cannot wait to help them complete their family. We met in person for the first time this weekend, and hit it off right away.  IM was amazing, and IF was great too. I was so nervous to meet them, but all went well and smoothly. We had a wonderful 2.5 hour visit, and I met their 5 year old daughter too. IM cried a few times, and I had to hold back the tears as well. They have been through so much. I need to give them their happy ending. 

Just tonight, IM emailed me to say that we are going to go ahead with the medical screening to make sure I am a good candidate to be a GS (gestational surrogate). We have an appointment booked for March 17, 2015 – the earliest she could get me in. I am excited, but nervous too. I have no reason to think I won’t pass screening, but it is nerve wracking. I don’t want to disappoint my IPs if it does not go through. Wish me luck!

The Baker